The anticipation of spring is a pleasurable agony. We burst forth onto fresh grass after months of snow blindness with a drooling zest and sense of wonder that the long winter’s dormancy has once again given way to life.

For our family, this special time has long been celebrated with the ceremonial unraveling of the clothesline. As the frugal member of the family, I am anticipating the dollars I am about to save as we attach the pulleys to the posts and I rush to unplug the dryer until fall.

Within the hour, given a fair wind and favourable temperature, an assortment of clothes, towels, bedsheets and just about anything removable is billowing on the line. As these items strain at their clothes pins, I rhapsodize about the crispness of their scent.

Imagine, then, the disappointment as I remove these items from the line and find bird droppings all over them. I do feel a sense of begrudging admiration for their accuracy; a direct hit on a waving ankle sock is no mean feat. But that’s countered by my anguish, as I visualize the hefty hydro and water bills as a result of having to launder these soiled items a second time. Can there be a solution to the problem? Let’s examine the merit of a few:

  1. Do not locate any sources of food; particularly berry bushes, close to the clothesline.
  2. Tie tin cans to the line to scare the **** out of them. (This could be a bit of a  double-edged sword though).
  3. Guard the laundry with a submachine gun. (This can make a terrible mess of the garage and is probably illegal).
  4. Move to somewhere that doesn’t have birds. (A subterranean cavern is a good choice, but I doubt there would be too many good drying days).
  5. Plug the dryer back in and console the frugal one with chocolate.

Photo by Félix Prado on Unsplash


One response to “The clothesline”

  1. Dianne Avatar

    Yup, I would plug the dryer back in and console myself with chocolate!

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